Changes in your body

• Tense muscles

• Rapid breathing and heart rate

• Headaches

• Difficulties sleeping well

• Fatigue

Changes in your behaviours

• Withdrawing from others

• Fidgeting, feeling restless

• Smoking, drinking or using more drugs than usual

• Avoiding situations that you think are stressful

Changes in your feelings

• Feeling worried or confused

• Feeling angry or irritable

• Feeling overwhelmed or helpless

• Feeling like you can’t cope

Changes in your thoughts

• Struggling to concentrate, remember or make decisions

• Losing your self-confidence

• Having a negative attitude towards yourself and your life

Focus on what you can do

There is usually something you can do to manage stress in most situations.

• Resist the urge to give up or run away from problems—these coping choices often make stress worse in the long run

Manage your emotions

Feelings of sadness, anger or fear are common when coping with stress.

• Try not to bottle your emotions up. Try expressing your feelings by talking or writing them down

• Try not to lash out at other people. Yelling or swearing usually pushes people away when you need them the most

• Many of the coping strategies listed below are useful ways of managing your emotions

Seek out support

Seeking social support from other people is helpful—especially when you feel you can’t cope on your own. Family, friends, co-workers and health professionals can all be important sources of support.

• Ask someone for their opinion or advice on how to handle the situation

• Get more information to help make decisions

• Accept help with daily tasks and responsibilities, such as chores or child care

• Get emotional support from someone who understands you and cares about you

Focus on the positives

This is one of the hardest things to do when coping with stress. At times, it can seem impossible. Dwelling on the negatives often adds to your stress and takes away your motivation to make things better.

• Identify and define the problem

• Determine your goal

• Brainstorm possible solutions

• Consider the pros and cons of each possible solution

• Choose the best solution for you—the perfect solution rarely exists

• Put your plan into action

• Evaluate your efforts and choose another strategy, if needed

Self-care

Taking good care of yourself can be difficult during stressful times, but self-care can help you cope with problems more effectively. The trick to self-care is to look for little things you can do everyday to help yourself feel well.

Here are some self-care activities to try. Try to think of other activities that might help!

• Eat healthy foods and drink lots of water throughout the day to maintain your energy

• Try to exercise or do something active on a regular basis

• Try to avoid using alcohol or drugs as a way to cope

• Explore relaxation techniques like meditation or yoga

• Try to balance work and play—too much work can eventually lead to burnout

• Spend time on things you enjoy, such as hobbies or other activities

• Get a good night’s sleep

Take care of your relationships

Family, friends and co-workers can be affected by your stress—and they can also be part of the problem.

Keep the feelings and needs of others in mind when coping with stress, but balance them with your own.

• Be assertive about your needs rather than aggressive or passive. Being assertive means expressing your needs without hurting others

• Try not to confront others in a mean-spirited or antagonizing manner

• Accept responsibility, apologize or try to put things right when appropriate

• Talk to others who are involved and keep them informed about your decisions

Spirituality

People who engage in a spiritual practice often experience lower levels of distress. If community is part of a spiritual practice, it may also offer helpful social support.

• Consider spiritual practices that fit with your beliefs, such as prayer or meditation

• Spend time at your place of worship or get together with others who share your beliefs

• Talk with a respected member or leader of your spiritual community

Acceptance

There may be times when you can’t change something. This can be the most challenging aspect of coping with stress. Sometimes, all you can do is manage your distress or grief.

• Denying that the problem exists may prolong your suffering and interfere with your ability to take action

• Acceptance is a process that takes time. You may need to remind yourself to be patient

• Death, illness, major losses or major life changes can be particularly difficult to accept

• Try not to get caught up in wishful thinking or dwell on what could have been

Distraction

Distraction can be helpful when coping with short-term stress you can’t control, such as reading a magazine while getting dental work done.

Distraction can be harmful if it stops you from taking action on things you can control, such as watching TV when you have school or work deadlines to meet.

Distraction by using drugs, alcohol or over-eating often leads to more stress and problems in the long term.

Distraction by overworking at school or on the job can easily lead to burnout or other problems, like family resentment.

You can do many things to take your mind off problems, such as:

• Daydreaming

• Going for a drive or walk

• Leisure activities, exercise, hobbies

• Housework, yard work or gardening

• Watching TV or movies

• Playing video games

• Spending time with friends or family

• Spending time with pets

• Surfing the Internet or sending e-mail

• Sleeping or taking a short nap

When used for short periods of time, many of these forms of distraction create opportunities to take a break and refuel—an important part of self-care.